What the Buddha taught us is that there is a natural order to things. When we take action that is in contradiction to that natural order it causes tension or stress to arise. For example if we were to run a train along a track it will run very smoothly. However if we apply a force to the train in a different direction while it’s moving, it will not go easily. If it we apply enough force we are likely to cause a train wreck.
Similarly, in our daily lives there is a natural path for all of us. When we are walking that path we will feel comfortable and happy. If we diverge from it, we are going to start to suffer and if we go too far off track the, consequences can be serious.
So how do we know when we’re on track or not? The answer is simple but requires some effort to put into practice (once the train is off track we need to put some energy into getting back on the rails). That answer is to label what we’re doing, feeling and thinking. When we get into the habit of doing that, we’ll be able to easily see what’s on track for us and what’s off track. But when we’re not paying attention by definition, we don’t know what’s happening and we cannot know what we really want.
That’s why it is so important that you start or continue your insight meditation practice, because it will put you on track in the right direction.